Our family tends to stand out in a crowd. When we were selling our home last year, we held an open house. A potential buyer told our realtor that he liked all the photos we staged around the house because they represented so many people. Little did he know those photos were just of our family!
One thing our family has had to learn is how to navigate conversations about our differences. Race, gender, languages, socio-economic status, immigrants, special needs, adoptees... sometimes it’s hard to know where to begin! Revelation 7:9-10 describes people from all nations and languages worshiping at the foot of the throne of God. This is a glimpse of what is to come, worshipping shoulder to shoulder with our brothers and sisters from all over the world.
While we long for that day in Heaven, we are living in a fallen world and culture where these differences in our skin tone, hair, language and abilities, etc. have been used to divide us. The idea of discussing these big topics with our kids can seem daunting. Here are a few tips and ways to get started:
- Open your Bible. Your physical Bible. Your kids need to see that the Bible is the authority on all subjects. It is truth. It is reliable. It is relevant. How do we understand gender? Sex? Race? Immigration? We go to God’s Word. Too often we have let politics guide our discussion on these topics. However, our goal as parents should not be to launch our children into the world standing firmly on a political platform. Our goal is to launch them into the world standing firmly on the Word of God.
- Be countercultural. Ask yourself: what is culture telling us? Is it biblical? One example is that culture tells us that to elevate a group of people, we should knock others down in the process. For example, I don’t need to knock down my sons or attack their masculinity or manhood to affirm my daughters in their womanhood. Our kids should feel more esteemed in their gender in the pages of their Bible than through any other book or form of media.
- Watch your language. Behind closed doors, in the privacy of your home, how do you speak about others? What do your children hear you say about people of a different nationality? Refugees? Immigrants? People experiencing homelessness? People with special needs? How we speak about others will influence our children and shape their perspectives. Use words that give dignity to the people you are speaking about.
- Expose your children to people and cultures that are different. Listen to worship music on YouTube in a different language. Try new foods and restaurants. Read books that have a lead character that looks different than your child. Approach moms at parks and playgrounds that don’t look like you and strike up a conversation. Get an atlas, research different countries and pray for the leadership of that country. For God so loved the world, every country, city, tribe, and nation. We want our kids to have a heart for all people.
- Check in to see where your kids are at. Ask your kids, “Have you noticed that some people use a wheelchair? What do you think about that?” or “Have you noticed that people have different shades of skin and different types of hair? What do you think about that?” Often parents avoid these conversations because they are afraid they will say the wrong thing. Use the Bible as your guide, pray about it and teach your kids how to love their neighbor.
As Christians we should be leading the charge on how to love others. We should be giving the world a blueprint on how to treat people with dignity and respect. Never sacrificing Biblical truth on the altar of love but learning that they go hand in hand. Leaning into these hard conversations, celebrating our differences, sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ with all people and waiting expectantly for the day when all believers will be worshipping together at the foot of the throne of God.